I shall be rich!

Have I told y'all about the English nonsense shirts that people wear in Taiwan? Basically, they'll buy anything that has English on it and looks cool (to them).

Have I told y'all about the intellectual nothing generator? I think I posted one on here once. It's a website that randomly generates essays that actually say nothing, but almost make sense--just enough to make you keep reading it, trying to figure it out.

This is an honest-to-goodness abstract of a literary analysis of Frankenstein. It sounds like it's from the above-mentioned website.

"Citation: Frankenstein: Creation as CatastropheAuthor(s): Paul SherwinSource: PMLA, Vol. 96, No. 5 (Oct., 1981), pp. 883-903Publisher: Modern Language AssociationStable URL: http://www.jstor.org/stable/462130
Abstract: Much in Frankenstein suggests that the novel and classicalpsychoanalysis are meant for each other. The creation becomes asignificant act, at once paradigmatic and intensely human, when viewedas a repetition of Frankenstein's primal-scene trauma, with theCreature emerging as a representation of the scene and the relatedoedipal complex. A psychoanalytic interpretation, however, requires adrastic secondary revision of Frankenstein, and not enough insight ispurchased by so much blindness. The analyst repeats, yet fails toelucidate, the misreading of world, self, and Creature that rendersFrankenstein a tiresome neurotic. But before this personal collapseFrankenstein achieved the sublime. His catastrophe of origination,engendering a creative self that anxiously pursues an impossibledesire and an artifact that both represents and eclipses the creator,serves as a paradigm of the genesis of any sublime artwork, anyuncanny reanimation project."

So, my plan is to take a picture of Boris Karloff as Frankenstein, put a pink heart around his face, slap it on a t-shirt and put the above abstract on there as well (probably at a slanting angle around the front and side of the shirt) and sell it for $500 NT a pop in Taiwan.